A year ago today, I wrote this memory of a perfect first date from the day before… A year later and I am even more in love with this woman.
Self Assessment – Smitten – 12-15-15
For just over a week I have become and been completely smitten by a new person in my life. She found me via OkCupid and yesterday, we met for the first time, spending the entire afternoon in Asheville, NC.
It was beyond magical. From the moment we met in person and hugged, a long deep lengthy hug and then proceeded to walk the sidewalks of Asheville, trying to catch our breath, it was just perfect and kept getting better.
We had started by messaging through the OkCupid app, then switched to emails, long awesome amazing emails. Then text messages and a couple two or three phone calls, before we decided to meet.
On my way to meet her, I phoned my friend Lenny. After a long marriage, he’s been divorced now for about two and a half years. He gave me the good advice (on my way to meet this amazing lady) to meet people soon after making a connection online. Don’t let weeks or months go by before you meet in person and confirm the electronic chemistry, the textual and audio chemistry, translates into physical presence and in person chemistry.
I was following his advice before I’d even heard it! It gave me even more confidence that the day was going to be great, despite the continuous rain that was pouring down as I drove.
As I got closer to Asheville, the rain dried up a bit and was gone by the time I parked. She was running just a bit late after getting stuck behind a ‘lorry’ in the North Carolina mountains (she’s from the UK). ☺
I had gotten an email while driving stating that I had less than 24 hours to renew my health insurance so I went to the soda fountain in the old Woolworth’s grabbed a chai latte, and jumped on the internet and renewed my insurance in the remaining time it took her to arrive. It was perfect timing, and helped ‘insure’ I would not be distracted with worry about my insurance, while I was with her that day.
As I mentioned, we hugged when we first met. It wasn’t easy to keep our hands off of one another. We mostly accomplished this, and then decided to walk to keep from lighting on fire right in the outdoor foyer of the parking garage.
She had lived in Asheville for a couple years some time ago and knew her way around well, even though the place had changed significantly since then. It allowed us to wander easily, and apply our focus to not getting run over in intersections because we were looking at each other as we walked instead of where we were going.
We held hands while walking the entire time. She’s just a couple inches shorter than I am and in medium heels was at eye level with me and our strides and speeds just felt perfect. So natural, so untroubled, it was very good.
When we were smiling like fools at each other, she occasionally pointed out a local attraction or building. It was amazingly cute and charming as she occasionally thought to play tour guide and then was lost in my smile and myself in hers.
We walked for about an hour, maybe a little less and eventually started to get hungry. It was just after noon, and we had passed an Indian restaurant, which she knew to be amazing.
The restaurant was Mela.
I looooovvvvvvveeeee Indian food, but had not had any really good Indian food in a very long time and had not had Indian food at all in at least a couple years. I would have made the trip just for the food, but the company was out of this world. We trekked back to find it.
The door of the restaurant, was very wide and all wood and amazingly beautiful and once through it, the smell inside was heavenly.
We eventually were seated with little delay. The food was so very good, even better than the smells. I sat across from her fighting my involuntary control to close my eyes and savor the food and wrestle my eyelids back open so that I could feast on her. We’d been walking side by side and I hadn’t been able to take her in as much or as intensely nor for so long.
We ate and talked for at least an hour. While we were there the skies opened up and down poured. There was a downspout just outside the door of the restaurant that looked like a raised fire hydrant had opened up to flood the street. It was the perfect reason to stay longer. I had a second, very full helping of food. Then we slowly sampled the soup and the dessert.
It was the best lunch I have had in decades, maybe ever.
I was so full and so un-satiated at the same time.
We left and started to walk again, when she had the idea to turn the other direction. We walked down hill and found a tea room, named Dobra I believe, but I probably have not spelled it correctly. How I managed to read any words at all that day amazes me.
We went in and looked for a bench or couch to sit on, when she noticed two friends having tea. Serendipity had kicked in and her intuition had brought us here. She caught up with her friends, introduced me to both of them and explained that we were on a date. She was glowing as she said this and I felt very happy for her and happier to be contributing.
We sat down and ordered a Rose tea eventually. We only made it to about page 50 of the tea book, menu. We sat side by side and started to slowly get to know each other’s feel. The benches were padded but not exactly the type that you could sit back and lounge comfortably.
The awkwardness probably helped us from becoming completely indecent and getting arrested. Asheville has a tourist slogan, ‘Love Asheville’ which definitely seemed to apply, but I don’t know that Asheville was completely ready for love, live in the tea room!
Who knows, maybe I’m wrong and missed an opportunity. 😉
We held hands, put arms around each other. I played with her delightfully wispy hair at times and discovered her beautiful ears. I was very full from the amazing lunch, but still snuck a couple ear nibbles in from time to time. We watched a young guy come in a couple tables over and sit down and start crafting some jewelry.
We stayed for maybe an hour, and then walked again.
We followed our intuition and chased the sunbeams around the buildings to stay warm. It was December in the mountains, but the sun felt wonderful.
We eventually drove to an old and beautiful cemetery in town. We first sat on a bench and kissed. Then we moved towards a large beautiful oak tree. We didn’t have any blankets or sheets. She had driven since she knew the area. I had an unused blanket packed away in my car, but hadn’t thought to bring it.
We ended up spreading our jackets and sweaters down on the ground. It was relatively dry under the tree despite the heavy morning rain.
We remained under that tree for ages as the sun bathed us from just over distant mountains and trees. When we opened our eyes, we saw each other and when we closed our eyes, it was hot red white light coming through our eyelids from each other and a little bit from the sun. We kissed endlessly and got to know each other very, very well.
Neither of us wanted the experience to end and we went from ecstasy to fits of giggling attacks of laughter as we discovered each other’s sense of humor. We kept our clothes on and held back on this first date and the teasingly perfect pleasure of each other went on until the sun finally started to set into the trees and hills.
We eventually peeled ourselves up from under that wonderful tree and walked and stumbled down the hill back to her car. Somehow, I do not know how, she managed to drive us back. We went back to the parking garage where we said our goodbyes after making tentative but very firm plans to see each other again and soon. She drove off and I walked back to my car and did the same.
It was absolutely amazing. I barely remember the drive home.